DHARMA, LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS
Nowadays, a relationship really can be quite a test—we might have to go through all kinds of difficulties. But, as Sogyal Rinpoche shows us, if we consistently apply our understanding of mindfulness, compassion and our unchanging innermost nature to our emotions and actions, a relationship can become both a cause and a part of our spiritual progress.
This series of teachings is divided into four parts:
- General Advice
- Falling in Love & Starting a Relationship
- Being in a Relationship
- When a Relationship Ends
PART 1: GENERAL ADVICE
Relationships show us how we really are and as such, they are an opportunity to learn about ourselves and to let go and change.
Advice on having a good relationshipMunich, 8 June 1997
Don't kill love with attachment and conceptsDzogchen Beara, 26 June 2008 & Amsterdam, 17 May 2008
Breaking conceptsSan Francisco, 27 May 1998
Accepting change and uncertaintyLerab Ling, 16 July 2013
PART 2: FALLING IN LOVE & STARTING A RELATIONSHIP
Take a moment to be clear and honest about what you want and where you are going. These teachings might give you a better chance of making a success of a new relationship.
The difference between attachment and attractionDzogchen Beara, 9 July 2000
Keep the love, avoid the fallingParis, 26 February 1999
Before you start, check to see whether you're suitedAmsterdam, 17 May 2008
PART 3: BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP
Use your relationship to work on yourself and apply the teachings to your life and actions. Use your love as a challenge to go beyond yourself, beyond attachment, concepts and patterns and find unconditional love. The way to love is to be completely open and fearless in your love, no matter what.
How to improve relationshipsBerlin, 28 June 1998
How to resolve the conflict within ourselvesPoconos, 5 June 1998
Resolving dominationPoconos, 5 June 1998
Dealing with jealousyDzogchen Beara, 20 December 1997
Quench the fire of anger with loveSydney 26 February 2005
Advice for getting married and partnershipLerab Ling, 3 August 1996; New York, 27 October 1997; Hamburg, 8 November 2004; Dzogchen Beara, 20 December 1997 & Millfield, 6 April 1998
Let go of attachment, be open and spaciousDzogchen Beara, 6 July 2010
PART 4: WHEN A RELATIONSHIP ENDS
Letting go is a process we all have to go through, one that helps us grow as circumstances change. We can learn to accept the truth of impermanence and let the teachings hold us.
Pull yourself togetherLondon, 9 December 2007
Strengthen yourself with practiceSydney, 7 March 2008
You're freeLerab Ling, 4 April 1999
Letting goParis, 29 June 1998
If you are interested in hearing more teachings from Sogyal Rinpoche on these topics, you might enjoy digging out the following old ZAM CDs and DVDs from your shelves, borrowing them from your friends or purchasing them through ZAM:
- Advice for Dharma Practitioners on Relationships, CDE019, an audio CD with 3 tracks.
- Relationships, CDE018, 3 audio CDs with a total of 17 tracks.
- Dharma, Love and Relationships, Rigpa Link October 2009, CD/DVE728, an audio CD or DVD with 5 tracks.
For your information: 11 of the 18 videos downloadable on this page for free come from the 3 ZAM releases mentioned above.